Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Geographically Impaired
Another reason I've been out of pocket recently is because I've been taking some new cases down in Tucson. You add the drive time and getting lost in Tucson time to already time-demanding task of working the case, and you soon run out of time.
Tucson is a very nice, picturesque town. I enjoy my trips down there, but I must say that the city fathers who designed the street system of the Catalina Foothills area should be taken out, summarily executed, and dumped in an unmarked grave in Ajo. Even my GPS had no clue where I was half the time. It told me to take Ina Road east to Campbell. So off I go, blindly trusting this contraption and paying litlle attention to my surroundings. Why should I? I got Radio Margaritaville on the Sirius, Mr. Garmin showing the way, and all I have to do is turn when he tells me. Never mind that he could'nt find the exact address on Camino A Los Vientos. He found another address just a few blocks away on the same street. How hard can that be?
Side Rant: And what's up with those ridiculous four and five word street names down there? It's neither quaint nor cool. It's just a pain in the ass.
So, Mr. Garmin takes me right to the address it indicated, and I head off east few blocks further to find the correct address I seek. The street winds around a couple of times and dead ends. I find it again a few blocks north, but it dead-ends again. So I call the guy. Turns out I'm like 200 yards from his house, but you can't get there from here. Go back to Ina Road, he says, and gives me directions from there. So I backtrack, only to find that Ina Road has disappeared. It has been replaced by something called Skyline Drive. What the? So I head east on Skyline Drive, trying to follow the directions my "thickly accented English as a second language" client has provided. Next thing I know, I'm on Sunrise Drive. I turn around and go back to the original spot, call the guy again. This time he gives me different directions. Turns out even the residents haven't clue about how to get around in there.
I have to wind my way back out, avoiding the quail, roadrunners, and snakes, get back on Campbell, and drive wa-a-a-y around on to River Road, go east, then north again on Hacienda del Sol (Here we go with the long-ass street names again). I watch my odometer carefully to know where the turn is, but next thing I know, I've reached Sunrise again. Dude must have given me the distance in kilometers. I turn around and find his place just down the road. Turns out I was a half mile away when I turned around earlier on Sunrise/Skyline/Ina Road.
I had to visit another address later that day. It was an old, somewhat rundown neighborhood in the middle of town, where Ruthrauff and Wetmore are the same freaking street. (You feeling me now?) It was a theft case, so I went to Tucson PD to pull the police report. "Sorry. That's Pima County," the nice lady tells me. A residental neighborhood. The middle of town. No horse property. No fields. No acreage. No driving through an uninhabited area to reach it. But it is nonetheless not in the City of Tucson.
Summary execution. Dawn. Start over again with some numbered streets that go straight and do not cross one another or change names, and get it right this time.
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Tucson is a very nice, picturesque town. I enjoy my trips down there, but I must say that the city fathers who designed the street system of the Catalina Foothills area should be taken out, summarily executed, and dumped in an unmarked grave in Ajo. Even my GPS had no clue where I was half the time. It told me to take Ina Road east to Campbell. So off I go, blindly trusting this contraption and paying litlle attention to my surroundings. Why should I? I got Radio Margaritaville on the Sirius, Mr. Garmin showing the way, and all I have to do is turn when he tells me. Never mind that he could'nt find the exact address on Camino A Los Vientos. He found another address just a few blocks away on the same street. How hard can that be?
Side Rant: And what's up with those ridiculous four and five word street names down there? It's neither quaint nor cool. It's just a pain in the ass.
So, Mr. Garmin takes me right to the address it indicated, and I head off east few blocks further to find the correct address I seek. The street winds around a couple of times and dead ends. I find it again a few blocks north, but it dead-ends again. So I call the guy. Turns out I'm like 200 yards from his house, but you can't get there from here. Go back to Ina Road, he says, and gives me directions from there. So I backtrack, only to find that Ina Road has disappeared. It has been replaced by something called Skyline Drive. What the? So I head east on Skyline Drive, trying to follow the directions my "thickly accented English as a second language" client has provided. Next thing I know, I'm on Sunrise Drive. I turn around and go back to the original spot, call the guy again. This time he gives me different directions. Turns out even the residents haven't clue about how to get around in there.
I have to wind my way back out, avoiding the quail, roadrunners, and snakes, get back on Campbell, and drive wa-a-a-y around on to River Road, go east, then north again on Hacienda del Sol (Here we go with the long-ass street names again). I watch my odometer carefully to know where the turn is, but next thing I know, I've reached Sunrise again. Dude must have given me the distance in kilometers. I turn around and find his place just down the road. Turns out I was a half mile away when I turned around earlier on Sunrise/Skyline/Ina Road.
I had to visit another address later that day. It was an old, somewhat rundown neighborhood in the middle of town, where Ruthrauff and Wetmore are the same freaking street. (You feeling me now?) It was a theft case, so I went to Tucson PD to pull the police report. "Sorry. That's Pima County," the nice lady tells me. A residental neighborhood. The middle of town. No horse property. No fields. No acreage. No driving through an uninhabited area to reach it. But it is nonetheless not in the City of Tucson.
Summary execution. Dawn. Start over again with some numbered streets that go straight and do not cross one another or change names, and get it right this time.
