Friday, December 09, 2005
Ol' Santa Has A Big Package For you, Darlin'
I love Christmas music. Always have. My all time favorite is Perry Como Sings Merry Christmas Music, because that's what we had when I was a little bitty fart growing up back in Roswell. I still have that original record, with the little five year-old-kid stick drawings of reindeer and Santa that I drew on the back when I was that age.
I'm much older and more sophisticated now. I stopped doing reindeer stick drawings like three Christmases ago, and I've come to look at my Christmas music from more than one angle. You know, a lopsided sort or Parrothead angle. So, without further adieu, and in honor of the AZPHC Christmas party with The Goat and Jello Shot Queen tomorrow night, I give you, in no particular order.....OK, that's a lie.....They're kind of in story order, but I nonetheless give you:
The Crime Dog's Top10 11 Out Of Context Christmas Song Lyrics
Your form inspires my song
We won't go until we get some
He's shinin' up the chimney
Hung where you can see
Mine is the shortest one, you'll be sure to know
Fill me with desire
Watch her peel
Oh, dear Santa, fill it well
Incriminating claw marks on her back
Rudolph whizzin' like a shootin' star
Who knew you could turn Christmas carols into a dirty story?
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I'm much older and more sophisticated now. I stopped doing reindeer stick drawings like three Christmases ago, and I've come to look at my Christmas music from more than one angle. You know, a lopsided sort or Parrothead angle. So, without further adieu, and in honor of the AZPHC Christmas party with The Goat and Jello Shot Queen tomorrow night, I give you, in no particular order.....OK, that's a lie.....They're kind of in story order, but I nonetheless give you:
The Crime Dog's Top
Your form inspires my song
We won't go until we get some
He's shinin' up the chimney
Hung where you can see
Mine is the shortest one, you'll be sure to know
Fill me with desire
Watch her peel
Oh, dear Santa, fill it well
Incriminating claw marks on her back
Rudolph whizzin' like a shootin' star
Who knew you could turn Christmas carols into a dirty story?
