Tuesday, November 22, 2005
It's Midnight, And I'm Not Gaming Yet.
How big a loser do you have to be to stand outside in the cold and rain (not here, obviously) for over 24 hours, just to be the first to buy some new X-Box video game gizmo? These dorks make Napoleon Dynamite look like the Homecoming King.
Sorry if I step on any toes here, but if you wait in line all day until midnight to buy pretty much anything, books and Star Wars tickets included, you're a dork. That said, the day they hand out free passes at midnght to play Pebble Beach is the day I will proudly accept the mantle of dorkhood.
But c'mon, a video game? What do these guys do for an encore? I'm guessing they stop off at Taco Bell just long enough to quit their jobs, then take the thing back to their mom's basement with a week's supply of Hot Pockets and Mountain Dew. Have fun, you pasty-looking dipshits.
I saw in the news today that an 83 year-old man pulling an oxygen tank in Georgia foiled two knife-wielding home invaders by retrieving an unloaded rifle from his laundry room and pointing it at them. The two dangerous criminals hauled ass out of there pronto. Score one more for those of us who believe strongly in the responsible private ownership of firearms. Even unloaded ones. Without one, this old fellow and his wife might have been sliced and diced. But on a more interesting note, wouldn't it just be special if the two idiots were captured and jailed? They'd be there in the slammer, trying to look like tough guys, but they would inevitably be recognized:
Hey, fresh meat! Ain't you the two ladies who got your asses run off by a geezer with an oxygen tank and an unloaded gun?
Those dudes will be butt monkeys their first night inside. Serves 'em right.
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Sorry if I step on any toes here, but if you wait in line all day until midnight to buy pretty much anything, books and Star Wars tickets included, you're a dork. That said, the day they hand out free passes at midnght to play Pebble Beach is the day I will proudly accept the mantle of dorkhood.
But c'mon, a video game? What do these guys do for an encore? I'm guessing they stop off at Taco Bell just long enough to quit their jobs, then take the thing back to their mom's basement with a week's supply of Hot Pockets and Mountain Dew. Have fun, you pasty-looking dipshits.
I saw in the news today that an 83 year-old man pulling an oxygen tank in Georgia foiled two knife-wielding home invaders by retrieving an unloaded rifle from his laundry room and pointing it at them. The two dangerous criminals hauled ass out of there pronto. Score one more for those of us who believe strongly in the responsible private ownership of firearms. Even unloaded ones. Without one, this old fellow and his wife might have been sliced and diced. But on a more interesting note, wouldn't it just be special if the two idiots were captured and jailed? They'd be there in the slammer, trying to look like tough guys, but they would inevitably be recognized:
Hey, fresh meat! Ain't you the two ladies who got your asses run off by a geezer with an oxygen tank and an unloaded gun?
Those dudes will be butt monkeys their first night inside. Serves 'em right.
