Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Why Don't We Get 303.0 and V69.2?
ICD-9. What a barrel of laughs.
I had to go out this morning and have some blood work done, to see if my prescriptions are doing what they are supposed to do. If simultaneously annoying and constipating me are what they are supposed to do, well, mission accomplished. I could have saved my insurance company some cash if they’d have just asked. Actually, “blood work” is too simple. What the lab form said I was getting was something called a “Comp Metabolic Panel (14)” because I have 790.6. It’s probably overkill. I’m sure a Comp Metabolic Panel (13) or even (12) would have done just as well for my 790.6. And besides, I really don’t feel 790.6. I felt a little 980 on Sunday morning after a bout of 303.0 the night before, and the chili I had for lunch made me a little 787.3. But 790.6? No way.
I have great respect for anybody who does a job that everyone else avoids like the plague. One of those people would be Vampira The Blood Lady, who took my blood this morning. I don’t know how the hell she does that day after day. If it were me, I would last about ten minutes before jabbing myself with a needle tipped with someone else’s blood. Then, it would be freak-out city for The Crime Dog. A total 300.01 due to 300.10 over 042.
And I’ll tell you who else has a rough job: That dude who came over and fixed my washing machine yesterday. You ever see some of the strange shit that lurks under a washing machine? Moving a washer is even scarier than moving a refrigerator. I wouldn’t have been surprised to go in there and check on the guy, only to find nothing but a pair of work boots and a couple of wrenches. When I was a kid, monsters lived under my bed. Now, they make their homes under my major appliances. Appliance repair guys should always travel with backup. One guy to move the washer, and another to keep a Remington tactical shotgun trained on the area being vacated by it, just in case. Just go totally E970 on whatever crawls out from under there.
Two more days till Phins To The West Kicks off. Watch your E860.0 intake, friends. Spending the morning with 784.0 and 787.0 ain't no way to enjoy the weekend.
Since we got in to tough jobs today, how about a trivia question? What Buffett song was written as a tribute to a janitor named “Eddie?”
